The Purpose...

I have been praying, well for almost a year now, that God would reveal to me what His plan is for me.

I'm in that season of life where nothing "fits."

I'm not talking about clothes either. Not that I wouldn't like to be a size or two smaller...maybe fit into those "skinny" pants again...but that's another rant for another day...that's not the kind of "fit" I'm talking about here.

I went back to work this year and I don't "fit" with my friends anymore, who are, for the most part, stay at home moms who homeschool. I still hang out with them. I still love them. I just don't have much in common with them these days. I miss being home with my kids, and while I like my job and find it rewarding, I just don't have a "career" mindset so I don't really "fit" at work either (although I have made a couple of special friends there). I'm so tired from working all day that my house is a disaster during the week so I'm not comfortable there, my car is lived in way too much so I'm not comfortable there, and my church is in "transition" so I'm really not comfortable there most of the time.

Has God ever stripped away all of your comfortable places, all at once? Did I mention my in-laws are moving to Oregon (their home was definitely one of my comfortable places...) <<>>

So for a year I have been pleading with God to explain to me what his plan is in all of this? Because I know he has one...and I know I'm dense enough to miss it for a really long time unless I pray about it a lot.

I got a glimpse this weekend.

I attended a Women of Virtue conference this morning. The keynote speaker was Tammy Maltby and can I just say, if you ever have the chance to hear her speak, to read her book, to see her television show...you should. She was awesome.

She talked about lifegiving. She spoke of pushing into other people's pain and bearing their burdens for them. That, and a few words of personal encouragement from a friend I attended with, popped on the light for me.

I have known from the beginning that God gave me my job. He handed it to me in a way that I could only know it was from Him. I just didn't know why.

Now I know. Feebly, with God working through me despite me, I have been able to give life at this school.

I am a parent of a child with ADHD, and a second child who is Bipolar. Because I am a teacher, I have been able to speak into the lives of countless parents who have children with these diagnoses, or symptoms. I have given them names of doctors, books to read, and practical ways to find solutions to the difficulties they face. I have also given them hope.

I think I may have been given a glimpse of my mission, my purpose, my calling.

I'm going to keep praying...will you join me?